Where Are You Heading?
Where Are You Heading?
Pathway Parenting Week 1 Recap
We titled this class "Pathway Parenting" for a reason: we're all walking down a path that’s leading somewhere. Sometimes, we choose that path deliberately, but other times, we might find ourselves on it without realizing how we got there. However, where we end up is often the logical outcome of the choices we make along the way.
Our destination is set by the course we take. Many of us have a general idea of where we’d like to end up, but most haven’t clearly defined that destination. As a result, we often fail to set the proper course, treating life casually, shooting from the hip, and hoping that we’ll land somewhere close to where we want to be.
Children Imitate Their Parents
There’s a recurring truth in Scripture, seen in passages like Jeremiah 9:14 and Ezekiel 16:44, which expresses the notion we know well today: "Like father, like son," or "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree." Children tend to imitate their parents.
We see this from the very beginning of the Bible. The descendants of Cain follow his path, while Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob repeat the same mistakes. Generation after generation, Israel falls into adultery and idolatry. Church history shows us that we, too, inherit the problems of those who came before us.
One undeniable reality of parenting is that we often end up much like our own parents. Many of us can recall things we swore we’d never do—ways we never wanted to be like our parents—and then, years later, after some stress and life experiences, we find ourselves doing the very same things.
Your Kids Are Watching
Just as we grew up to reflect our parents, so too will our children imitate us. They are shaped by the collective choices we as parents make throughout their lives. In my experience counseling families, it became clear quickly: spend a few hours with a child, and you’ll often gain a clear picture of the home they come from.
While there are always external influences—such as friends, culture, and the spiritual realities of the world—parents still play the most significant role in shaping who their children become. From the very beginning, children are always watching. They absorb every smile, every frown, and every response—even mimicking the way parents talk and laugh.
In many ways, the person your child becomes is a direct reflection of your actions, habits, and values. The reality that many parents miss is this: more often than not, the challenges we face with our kids aren’t "kid problems"—they’re "parent problems."
God’s Standard for Parenting
God provided clear instructions for parents in Israel because He understands the vital role they play in shaping future generations. In other words, He knew the goal. He knew where He wanted them to end up. When He gave His law to Moses, He included this crucial command to the people of Israel:
“Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up” (Deuteronomy 11:18-19).
The LORD and Moses knew that for the future generations of Israelites to become what they were purposed to be, God’s law had to be more than words—they had to live it out daily. Whether sitting at home, walking through town, or preparing for bed, the things of God were to be ever-present in their lives, both spoken and demonstrated. They had to walk the correct path.
Unfortunately, not everyone grows up with the benefit of such a consistent example. Some parents never give much thought to how their actions impact their children. Others may be absent from the home. And then there are those who deeply desire to parent well but aren’t sure how. They have a general sense of direction, but it’s usually foggy, and thus, they struggle to figure out the steps needed to get to the destination.
Where Are You Heading?
We are all on a path to a specific destination, whether we realize it or not. And, intentionally or not, we are setting our children on that same path. As the saying goes, “If you’re not careful, you might just end up where you’re going.” For some of us, that could be a wake-up call.
Our goal as parents is to get our children on the right path, leading them toward the right destination. They are watching us, and they will either follow the path we set or choose their own based on what the world offers them.
So, where are you heading? What are your goals?
If you don’t have goals, it’s no surprise when you, your marriage, or your children end up somewhere you never intended.
Take some time over the next few days to reflect and write down your goals. You may not have thought much about it, but you probably have some ideas—foggy though they may be—of what you want for yourself and your children.
We challenge you to get specific with your goals. Discuss them with your spouse. Ask yourselves:
Think about what you want for your future. What areas of your life are most important to you? Which areas matter less?
Prepare for Next Wednesday
Next Wednesday, be ready to share your thoughts. We'll break into smaller groups and discuss some of the goals you've set for yourself, your marriage, and your children. Let’s journey together toward setting a course that leads to the destination God desires for our families.
Our destination is set by the course we take. Many of us have a general idea of where we’d like to end up, but most haven’t clearly defined that destination. As a result, we often fail to set the proper course, treating life casually, shooting from the hip, and hoping that we’ll land somewhere close to where we want to be.
Children Imitate Their Parents
There’s a recurring truth in Scripture, seen in passages like Jeremiah 9:14 and Ezekiel 16:44, which expresses the notion we know well today: "Like father, like son," or "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree." Children tend to imitate their parents.
We see this from the very beginning of the Bible. The descendants of Cain follow his path, while Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob repeat the same mistakes. Generation after generation, Israel falls into adultery and idolatry. Church history shows us that we, too, inherit the problems of those who came before us.
One undeniable reality of parenting is that we often end up much like our own parents. Many of us can recall things we swore we’d never do—ways we never wanted to be like our parents—and then, years later, after some stress and life experiences, we find ourselves doing the very same things.
Your Kids Are Watching
Just as we grew up to reflect our parents, so too will our children imitate us. They are shaped by the collective choices we as parents make throughout their lives. In my experience counseling families, it became clear quickly: spend a few hours with a child, and you’ll often gain a clear picture of the home they come from.
While there are always external influences—such as friends, culture, and the spiritual realities of the world—parents still play the most significant role in shaping who their children become. From the very beginning, children are always watching. They absorb every smile, every frown, and every response—even mimicking the way parents talk and laugh.
In many ways, the person your child becomes is a direct reflection of your actions, habits, and values. The reality that many parents miss is this: more often than not, the challenges we face with our kids aren’t "kid problems"—they’re "parent problems."
God’s Standard for Parenting
God provided clear instructions for parents in Israel because He understands the vital role they play in shaping future generations. In other words, He knew the goal. He knew where He wanted them to end up. When He gave His law to Moses, He included this crucial command to the people of Israel:
“Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up” (Deuteronomy 11:18-19).
The LORD and Moses knew that for the future generations of Israelites to become what they were purposed to be, God’s law had to be more than words—they had to live it out daily. Whether sitting at home, walking through town, or preparing for bed, the things of God were to be ever-present in their lives, both spoken and demonstrated. They had to walk the correct path.
Unfortunately, not everyone grows up with the benefit of such a consistent example. Some parents never give much thought to how their actions impact their children. Others may be absent from the home. And then there are those who deeply desire to parent well but aren’t sure how. They have a general sense of direction, but it’s usually foggy, and thus, they struggle to figure out the steps needed to get to the destination.
Where Are You Heading?
We are all on a path to a specific destination, whether we realize it or not. And, intentionally or not, we are setting our children on that same path. As the saying goes, “If you’re not careful, you might just end up where you’re going.” For some of us, that could be a wake-up call.
Our goal as parents is to get our children on the right path, leading them toward the right destination. They are watching us, and they will either follow the path we set or choose their own based on what the world offers them.
So, where are you heading? What are your goals?
If you don’t have goals, it’s no surprise when you, your marriage, or your children end up somewhere you never intended.
Take some time over the next few days to reflect and write down your goals. You may not have thought much about it, but you probably have some ideas—foggy though they may be—of what you want for yourself and your children.
We challenge you to get specific with your goals. Discuss them with your spouse. Ask yourselves:
- What are my goals for myself? (spiritually, socially, professionally, etc.)
- What are my goals for my marriage?
- What are my goals for my kids?
Think about what you want for your future. What areas of your life are most important to you? Which areas matter less?
Prepare for Next Wednesday
Next Wednesday, be ready to share your thoughts. We'll break into smaller groups and discuss some of the goals you've set for yourself, your marriage, and your children. Let’s journey together toward setting a course that leads to the destination God desires for our families.
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